So there I was, minding my own business, sitting in my car in front of a high rise apartment building across from Asphalt Green, waiting to pick up my daughter and her friend from softball practice.
It was a warm, beautiful summer afternoon with an amazingly blue, cloudless sky and a strong but warm breeze blowing in from the East River. Jonathan Schwartz was playing something by Nancy Lamott on WHYY, and I was trying to think of a 9 letter word meaning “commonplace”.
I don’t know what made me look up from my Sunday Times crossword. Maybe I was hungry.
All I know is that, at that moment, a large uncooked hamburger patty fell from the sky and splattered onto my windshield. Come to think of it, it didn’t really splatter much. It just sort of spread itself out there on the wipers in front of me.
No cheese. No bun. No fries. Just fresh, raw ground beef.
Now that’s what I call a heavenly burger.
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Apologies to Judy and Ron Barrett for mutilating the cover of their wonderful children’s book.
Thank God you were in your car and not on a park bench forced to pull ground chuck from your hair or worst yet, run madly from stray dogs for 10 blocks.
And somewhere above you, some poor cook was peering over the balcony wondering who at his party was going to go hungry….
Near-miss assault by a blunter (blunt burger) – that would have looked interesting if it had been frozen and you had needed to file an insurance claim for your windscreen.
formulaic
hackneyed
Was the story that you needed the word or that madcow hit the windshield? Wasn’t certain…
🙂