Healthcare 3G

Twice as fast. Half the price.

Sounds good, right? It should – it’s the slogan for the new Iphone 3G. Everyone wants one, including me.

Ironically, this is also the slogan for modern medical care.

Because as the reimbursement goes down, docs are seeing more and more patients. Half the price, twice as fast.

You get 15 minutes, tops, talking to a back of a person typing madly away at a computer while you talk. We can take some additional history while we examine you. Write that script even as we’re telling you what we’ve found. Print out that script or referral faster than you can get dressed, and have it all ready for you by the time your check out. No need to ask questions – here’s a print out with the answers to ones you didn’t even think of. Now on to the next room!

Want it even cheaper and faster? Head over to your nearest in-store clinic and see a nurse practitioner instead of a doc. Heck, we’ll even start making nurses doctors – that’ll really lower the price.

Now, we all know that as electronics get cheaper, the quality starts to suffer a bit. Laptops konk out after 3 years. DVD players last just long enough for us to catch the last season of the Sopranos. That new fancy cell phone’s battery won’t hold a charge longer than an hour.

Same thing in health care.

Because fast works for things like sore throats, vaginal infections and vaccinations. But better not have a complicated problem, or need coordination of care between specialists, or god forbid, need to talk to someone because you’re anxious or depressed. We can’t handle that. Not at these prices. Sorry.

Of course, when that cheap DVD player breaks, you can just head out to Best Buy and get another.

Unfortunately, that option won’t work in health care.

Not to worry. That’s why we have lawyers.
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This post was written in response to a call for submissions to Grand Rounds at Shrinkrap 6/24/08.

4 Responses to Healthcare 3G

  1. I am a Family Nurse Practitioner that is holding out on the DNP until I see if it’s worth the time, effort and money to pursue. As it stands, with a MSN, I can already diagnose, treat, order tests, and educate my patients. I also make referrals to outside MDs if I find something that I am not familiar with or is outside of my scope. I think that I am a great primary care provider and I understand my limitations. We all (NP or MD) need to understand what we can and can’t take care of in order to protect our patients.
    I can’t see spending another three years in school and adding additional costs to my already 83,000 dollars of tuition. I already have spent 7 years in school to get where I am and it’s what I love doing.

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